The Good Nerd Guide
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by: Lelue
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Some people just don’t know how to be nerdy enough to be a real nerd. So here is the first ever guide of how to get it right.
One of the classic nerd traits are glasses. Wear them even if you don’t have to, And don’t forget , normal people wear glasses too, so you have to make sure that they are too big for your face, and never ever forget the classic nerd glasses trade mark. The white tape around the middle
Another classic nerd item is the buck teeth. Of course only the lucky nerd are the ones with natural bucked teeth. So if you don’t have that feature, the next best thing that you can do is curl your upper lip up all the time so that it may appear so.
A nerd is never found wearing a purse or wallet any where. Most are caught wearing fanny packs. Yes. Old ladies use them. But guess what? So do nerds.
Not only you have to look like a nerd, you must submit your self to nerd only television which often include Star Trek, Battlestar Galacticca, and Stargate. (Never watch normal TV)
Now remember that you must be knowledgeable about the most useless things that no one would ever care about. (Never get this mixed up with geeks, they are usually experts in fields like chemistry and biology, unlike nerds who will know everything there is to be known about a certain level of a certain videogame.)
One more classic thing, is have the stupid laugh. Squeak. Snort. Anything, but a normal laugh to distinguish your self from normal people in the crowd.
Make sure you have a annoying trait that will bother people around you. Like chewing with your mouth open or the constant clicking or your pen.
Always remember that the video game on your Gameboy, Playstation, or what ever you have will be the center of your life. Who needs friends anyway, if you have to get Mario through Yoshi Land after school.
Always have a stupid story to tell that no one cares about, (That you repeatedly tell) so that everyone will want to avoid you.
Lastly don’t forget that in this world of nerdiness, you might not know what is going on. SO it is best to put on a “Hello My Name Is” sticker signed with you name, just in case you might get lost in you nerdy ways, and have to return to class.
Initiation Test: Homecoming is on it’s way, and you really want a date. Walk up to the guy/girl you to go out with and ask him/her out. If she/he:
a)Laugh in your face and walks away
b)Just stands there and makes fun of you
c)Acts like you aren’t there
Then congratulations you have officially became a the nerd, by following our How To Be A Good Nerd Guide. You have learned how to be nerdy right. Now I suggest for Home Coming, you inflate your date and show up being the biggest nerd there.
Check out my other work and books at
http://www.freewebs.com/lelue/
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